


Hella Gay

by WarwomanWay



Series: You people give me road rage [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Teen Wolf (TV), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Almost smut, Darcy is a cockblock, Humor, M/M, Mostly Crack, blind dates, half assed hand jobs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-13
Updated: 2015-03-05
Packaged: 2018-03-07 10:10:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3170975
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WarwomanWay/pseuds/WarwomanWay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lydia and Natasha keep trying to set Stiles up with women.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jamesm97](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jamesm97/gifts).



It started with Darlene, an intern who works in the math department with Lydia. The date was nice but there was nothing there, not really.   
Then there was Kate who spent way too much time with Clint at the shoot range. Stiles really liked Kate, but as far as being a woman named Kate he just had to draw the line, because he still cringed when ever he said her name, which wasn’t Bishop’s fault.   
There was the casual lunch with the woman from H&R that Natasha had forced him into, which was a disaster from the start but had gotten worse when her boyfriend had shown up. The few days of Natasha waiting on him hand and foot was almost worth getting his ass kicked by a former college linebacker. 

Stiles finally put his foot down after Crystal a receptionist Lydia tried to set him up with.   
“I love you both but this has got to stop.” Stiles tell Natasha and Lydia one morning after cornering them in one of Starks break rooms.  
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Natasha said playing it cool. Lydia just smiled an act in itself that told Stiles way more then he needed to know, and frustrated him to no end.  
“The girls. The dates. Just stop.” Really he was at the end of his rope.  
it was amusing at first but now, now it was just sad and annoying.  
“Stiles, we just want you happy.” It was Lydia who spoke up.  
Stiles scoffed and rolled his eyes. “So you two decided to join forces to get me laid?”  
Both women just shrugged and Stiles groaned dramatically slamming his head on the table.

A week later he thought the subject had dropped that Natasha and Lydia he started to breathe easier again, that is until Darcy comes skipping into the lab.  
“What’s this I hear about you having a hot date?” Darcy asks while silmitanuosly shoving a donut in his mouth.  
Stiles almost chokes but not because of the donut. “I don’t have a date.” He protests after taking the pastry out of his mouth.  
Darcy looks relieved. “That what I told Clint because there is no way you would have a date and not tell me.” She is almost offended by the mere thought and it makes Stiles laugh out loud. “I mean you tell me about all your dates; even that weird chick with the foot fetish.”  
Stiles made a face and almost gagged that was one memory that was best not to be relived. “I have no idea what the hell Natasha was thinking.”  
Darcy shrugged. “You should have seen some of the chicks she tried to set Steve up with.”  
Something tells Stiles it’s probably a good idea if he didn’t. he loves Natasha and knows she would kill for him but he really does not trust her taste in people he dates. Hell half the time he doesn’t even trust his own judgment.

The date Natasha had set him on was a total bust like he thought he would have been. Natasha had gotten word back just as soon as it had ended, she had been getting her nails done with Lydia and Darcy.  
“I don’t understand why he has to be so picky.” Lydia sighed sipping on her margarita.   
Natasha makes a noise of agreement. “We try so hard to find the right one for him.”  
Darcy snorts into her drink listening to the whole conversation. Both women turn to look at her.   
“What do you know Lewis?” Lydia asks narrowing her eyes.  
“Stiles is hella gay.” Darcy declared.  
“Since when?” Lydia asked.  
“How do you know?” Natasha demanded.  
Darcy shrugged. “Since probably forever and I figured it out when we kissed.” She sounded to proud of herself.  
“You kissed Stiles?” There was a hint of jealousy in Lydia’s voice.  
Darcy nodded. “It was like kissing my brother.”   
By the end of the night the three women had hatched a new plan to get Stiles laid.


	2. Chapter 2

"You have got to be kidding me." Stiles groaned as he stood in Natasha's apartment. 

"You look great." Lydia told him reaching over and smoothing out his collar. 

"Seriously Stiles suits are your thing." Darcy cat called flopping down on the nearest couch. 

"Et tu Darcy?" Stiles asked wounded to see his soul sister was apart of the set up. 

 Darcy raised up from the couch grinning. "Don't worry Stiles I unlike those two..." She paused gesturing about at Lydia and Natasha. "Only I have your best interest at heart."

"So does that mean I get a hot super soilder?" 

Darcy scoffs rolling her eyes. "I love you Stiles Stilinski but I'm not sharing my super soldiers with you." Stiles pouted. "Its the next best thing." She promises.

The door bell rings and all three women are pushing Stiles towards the door. 

Stiles jaw dropped to the floor when he opened the door. Standing there was Sam Wilson aka the Falcon in a really nice suit. 

"Uh hi." Stiles blushed bright red waving the man inside. 

Sam chuckled walking through the threshold. "Hey yourself." Sam replied smoothly. 

 Stiles swallowed hard as Natasha pushed him and Sam out of the door, behind them Darcy is giving him a wide gin and a thumbs up. 

"Go have fun." Natasha smiled giving Sam a meaningful look to which he nodded. 

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Darcy calls after them leaving them both chuckling.

"I guess that leaves our options wide open then." Sam commented with a wink.

Stiles laughed linking his arms with Sam's.

 

"So how was it?" Was the first words out of Darcy's mouth the next morning as she passed him a cup of coffee.

Stiles blushed and then grinned. "I don't think I should tell you."

Darcy pouted and moved the coffee away causing Stiles to protest reaching for the cup.

"You give me the details and I'll give you the coffee."

Stiles groaned. Damn she was evil. "It was great." Stiles admitted with a blush creeping up his face.

Darcy shakes her head. "Nope need more than that, bro." 

His face just got redder. "Fine. It was more then great, he is a damn good kisser."

Darcy frowned disappointed. "All you did was kiss?" 

Stiles nodded reaching out for the cup of coffee which Darcy handed over this time with a groan.

"I need to find someone else to live vicariously through." She sighed unhappily.

"Barne and Rogers still gone?" He asked knowing the answer, it was after all the reason Darcy was so grumpy lately. 

"Yup. Not sure when they will be back." 

Stiles made a sympathetic sound before pulling her into a hug. 

"Wanna go harass Barton?" He offered knowing exactly what would make his girl happy.

Darcy grinned and nodded slowly. "Oh yeah."

 

Stiles is sitting on the couch in his apartment with Sam, well Sam was sitting on the couch and Stiles was almost practically sitting on Sam, but hey it still counted.

 Yeah things were going good between the two of them, so good that Sam was working Stiles shirt off while pressing his mouth against the younger man's. 

Stiles moaned out breathlessly pulling away to peel his shirt off himself, he shivered when Sam's hands ran over the smooth surface of his abs. 

"I work out." Stiles declared proudly causing Sam to chuckle. 

"That. I. Have. To. See." He punctuated each with word with a kiss on Stiles chest causing the boy to wiggle on his lap. 

"Shit. If you keep doing that I might cum my pants." Stiles whined. 

"You could get off from me kissing you?" Sam asked smirking leaning down to kiss Stiles even lower. 

"Nnng... Yes." Stiles cried out as he felt a hand unzip his pants and free his cock.

"Don't cum yet." Sam ordered his breath hot against his ear.

A small needy gasp escapes Stiles mouth as Sam's long fingers wrap around his hard cock that was already leaking. 

"Gonna make you cum so good baby boy." Sam whispered huskily. 

As Stiles groaned out Sam's name the door to the apartment opens and Darcy busts through.

"Holy shit!" She exclaimed almost amused. "Put a sock on the door." 

 


End file.
